These past few days, an article titled "Are Chinese Men Not Good Enough for Chinese Women?" has become a hot topic of discussion, since it basically touches the hearts of all netizens. As it happens, in this hot summer, a user wrote in saying that Old Hu's articles are too technical, obscure, and dry. So today, Old Hu is going to get a bit humanistic and share how tech people feel about this hot topic. After all, the more tech, the more humanistic.

The core of the article "Are Chinese Men Not Good Enough for Chinese Women?" is to point out that Chinese men are mainly not good enough for Chinese women in terms of appearance. Its confident arguments are as follows:

1. From an external perspective, Chinese men have a poor image and demeanor.

Chinese women, from factory workers to white-collar beauties, all have style and class—at least dressed properly, pleasing to the eye, with sparkling eyes. Men, on the other hand: male workers have sallow faces and dry hair, while "white-collar men" slouch with hunched backs, bleary eyes, and listless energy. The conclusion is that Chinese men who are broad-shouldered, vigorous, and exceptionally handsome are extremely rare.

Foreigners especially hold this view. The recent Western male Nobel Prize in Literature winners—from Naipaul, Coetzee, Pamuk, Le Clézio, to Llosa—are all elegant and charming, each with their own charisma, every one of them worthy of being called a silver fox. In contrast, China produced Mo Yan, who created a sensation, and his looks need no further description.

Some so-called female elites say that after middle age, Chinese men don't care about their image, and have no interest in participating in fitness that benefits their figure and body shaping—or their participation is far lower than in other countries. "Because they don't plan to please women with their appearance at all."

2. Chinese women—and basically everyone else—don't value men's appearance.

Surveys show that Chinese women have a very high tolerance for men's body shape and looks. One survey asked, "Of the 20 common shortcomings in men, which ones can you absolutely not tolerate?" Not being handsome ranked last, while poor integrity ranked first, and being stingy with money ranked third.

In a word, Chinese women value men's character and financial strength—their "reliability and sense of security"—the most, and value men's "appearance" the least. As long as a man has money and power, even if he's fat and greasy with a big belly, large numbers of beauties will still flock to him; as long as he has a car and a house, even if he's bald with yellow teeth, he can still defeat the passionate romance of handsome hunks.

There are many around Old Hu: handsome men without money remain single. In many women's eyes, what's the use of being handsome? You can't swipe a bank card with it. Hehe, in the end, even the handsome king gets eaten by a pawn. Especially those with relationship experience—of course, there are many in the "looks club," but for the most part that's just playing around. When it really comes to choosing a spouse, financial resources and character still occupy the mainstream consciousness.

3. Officials haven't set a good example in appearance either; being overweight and dressing inappropriately makes many officials an aesthetic disaster zone.

Abroad, from Clinton to Obama to Putin, they can be said to be full of masculinity. In contrast, in China, take the fallen Chongqing official Lei Zhengfu as an example: bald, greasy, pot-bellied, and flabby. But even with such a body, as long as you hold power, beauties still flock to you.

Besides lacking motivation, Chinese men also lack the ability to improve their appearance. "Big head and thick neck—if not a boss, then a cook." Men in politics and business commonly gain weight, which is related to the places they frequent. In China's relationship-based society, there are all kinds of social engagements, with clinking glasses and swirling smoke. Many matters in China need to be "talked over"; the so-called "talking over" means problems that are not easy to solve at the table and need to be resolved in private. To "talk," you have to go to private clubs and restaurants, not the gym.

4. Given the real-world environment, Chinese men seem to lack both the necessity and the ability to improve themselves.

On forums, a representative statement is: "I'm very sorry. I get up earlier than the chickens and sleep later than the dogs. My greatest wish is to sleep until I wake up naturally. How could I have time to groom myself?"

5. Tech Uncle's comments:

In Old Hu's view, there are indeed many cases where Chinese men don't measure up to Chinese women in appearance. However, this needs to be viewed with a dynamic eye. Before age 30, women seem to have the advantage in appearance, but women age quickly and soon become yesterday's flowers. When a woman's beauty fades, the man is just ushering in his glorious moment, and the balance of the match begins to tip. Don't you see that countless divorces follow this pattern? As men's experience and wealth grow, their overall value generally rises year by year, while women's declines. Of course, the lower strata are not within the scope of this discussion.

In addition, from a physiological and psychological perspective, women's main hobbies are dressing up and eating well, while many men's pleasure is making money. Their pursuit of wealth and women far exceeds their pursuit of their own external image.

A friend said that when he met a Chinese-language professor who had come from Beijing to teach in Silicon Valley, he could tell from a single look at a photo that this was an American. His eyes and posture showed relaxation and confidence, whereas Chinese men are tense, anxious, and full of bitterness. You can tell whether a Chinese person comes from the mainland or Taiwan, whether he has just arrived in the US or has been there for a year or five. The inner determines the outer—it can't be faked.

In reality, Chinese men bear too much during the social transition. In the IT and tech fields, men's exhaustion and stress are far higher than women's. In big cities, more and more men are getting premature gray hair and dying suddenly. IT men in particular are becoming a "confused generation," with 35 as the life-and-death line, and nowhere to put their future.

This is a generation under "mountains of pressure." They seriously overdraw their bodies, wishing they could work 24/7 to race on the path toward climbing to the top and achieving fame. Their insecurity and anxiety, to some extent, far exceed those of their fathers' generation.

They have experienced nearly the entire thirty years of rapid socioeconomic development in China, from extreme material scarcity to rapid wealth; they have also witnessed the breaking of established orders such as the restoration of the college entrance examination, the one-child policy, the dismantling of the iron rice bowl, enterprise restructuring, the abolition of welfare housing allocation, and China's entry into the WTO.

When the order is broken, someone always pays the price. And men are the backbone who foot the bill.

Many people say men can just relax a bit. But not only can "this humble concubine" not do it, even "this humble subject" can't either.

Just like a widely circulated picture once said: "If I pick up the bricks, I can't hold you; if I put down the bricks, I can't feed you." Many women live at home as full-time housewives with polished appearances, but behind them men go out and fight hard.

In reality, how hard the dream of striving is for men.

In China, a very small number of families possess the vast majority of national wealth, and a very small number of men control the mainstream wealth. The source of wealth rarely comes from one's own efforts, but rather from factors such as birth and privilege. The powerful and privileged also crowd out the living space of ordinary people.

Especially for ordinary men, 35 to some extent means the "life-and-death line" in the workplace. For many IT men, 35 even means the end of their technical career. What about after 40? What about after 50? Pension insurance and unemployment insurance—none of these are reliable. Only by working hard while young is the way.

Writing up to this point, the night is deep. Old Hu has worked a full day, exhausted in body and mind. Tomorrow the sun will rise as usual, and I still have to keep struggling. Better wash up and go to sleep. Life is like being raped—since you can't resist, change your mindset and enjoy it a bit.

Author: Old Hu (public account: Old Hu Talks Tech, or laohushuokeji)